Laughter-Induced Asthma?

I laughed so hard when I read this resolution, I think I may have laughter-induced asthma, much as my son, the swimmer guy has just been diagnosed with exercise-induced asthma.

(I emailed the author my physical reaction and he replied:

“Well, that’s gratifying although I suppose killing ones audience is a suboptimal strategy in the long run.”

It’s a good thing I am not in the hall outside a Prairie Grove District 46 Grade School Board secret meeting.)

Please enlarge the resolution by clicking on it and join in my amusement of what Allan Showalter, the author of “Heck of a Guy” blog created:

Flash Photography
Appreciation Day

Inspired by Carpentersville’s non-binding resolution making English the official language of the village, Showalter came up with this resolution, which gives me approval to proclaim such a day whenever I wish.

What a Heck of a Guy!

And he has more at

The Non-Binding Resolution Bindery

Showalter says,

“…the process of creating such resolutions is poetically and accurately described by those famous lines from Macbeth:

… it is a tale
Told by an idiot, full of sound and fury,
Signifying nothing.”

Of course, he has more to say and this self-effacing comment caught my attention:

As for the idiot telling the tale, DrHGuy certainly wants in on that action.

He suggests “eliminating the middleman,” that is the resolution-sponsoring councilman, state legislator or congressman.

Do it yourself!

He’s even come up with a marketing slogan:

If you wish, you can read the witty (“declare that the official languages of a given town would henceforth be apportioned on the basis of population percentages”) suggestions/instructions on how to write such a resolution. There’s even a fill-in-the-blank sample.

And free use of his seal.

Frankly, it sounds like the beginning of a scam similar to the name a star after someone scheme to separate you from your money. (“Only $49.95.”)

That is to say, it has money-making potential.

But, he’s GIVING THEM AWAY!

(Even though “DrHGuy eschews whenever possible the all caps missive,” I could not resist.)

Apparently, One Heck of a Guy is not one heck of a businessman.

And, for some reason, this reminds me of a resolution I drafted as a state representative in the 1970’s honoring departing Coventry Republican precinct committeeman Dave Musselman.

I had the Illinois House of Representatives wishing him a good life in Rockford. I ended it wishing best wishes to “…David, Phyllis and his son, David John.”

I also pointed out how Musselman had come up with support groups for Crystal Lake Mayoral candidate Tony Wujcik’s campaign. “Pets for Wujcik.” “Joggers for Wujcik” and “Streakers for Wujcik” come to mind, but, maybe, I left out the latter one.

A Daily News reporter selected it as one to point out the types of non-binding resolutions passed by members of the Illinois General Assembly.

I wonder why.


Leave a Reply

Your email address will not be published. Required fields are marked *